Domestic Abuse

Overview | What to Look For | What to Do | What to Avoid
What to Expect | Troubleshooting

Suspicion of Incident

Overview

Most victims and offenders are reluctant to report domestic abuse due to a multitude of factors.  Most do not report primarily because of fear of negative career impact, fear of escalating violence, minimization and denial of abuse, belief that abuse is acceptable, or lack of confidence in helping agencies.  This means leaders may have to rely on suspicions of domestic abuse in order to determine a course of action.   Recognizing signs of abuse is extremely important given leaders are required to report all reasonable suspicions of domestic abuse to the proper authorities.   

What to Look For

• Supervisors/peers may overhear, observe, or become aware of escalating arguments or other marital conflict that indicate intentional non-accidental use of physical force may have occurred.

• Marine offenders or victims may not be performing up to standard, seem preoccupied with personal matters, or may come in late or ask for time off more frequently.  When asked about problems, may give vague, defensive, or embarrassed responses. 

• Offenders or victims may also be top performers, appear highly controlled, and may become defensive and angry if asked about personal problems.

• Marine may avoid going home, complain about spouse/partner, or refer to spouse/partner in excessively derogatory terms. May make comments that indicate violence may have occurred or fear of violence exists.

• Marine never brings spouse to unit events or restricts spouse's access to military benefits or sources of support.  May refuse assistance for or access to spouse.

• Marines who have been the target of abuse may try to cover or camouflage injuries, may be reluctant to change clothes in front of others, or avoid participating in unit PT that might reveal injuries.

• Marine victims may give explanations for injuries that seem implausible or seem to have frequent unexplained injuries.  Injuries to the face or defensive injuries to the extremities are particularly concerning.

• Marine offenders may boast about abusive behavior, make threatening remarks, or make comments indicating that using violence against a spouse or intimate partner is justified.

• Marine or spouse/partner may seem excessively jealous and controlling.

What to Do

• Talk to the Marine in private about concerns but avoid becoming confrontational, be specific about what you have observed.  If inquiry does not support that abuse is occurring or has occurred but other issues are impacting performance, convey support for getting help and offer options. 

• If abuse has not occurred, options include strongly encouraging participation in prevention programs and classes offered through MCCS that deal with the identified problem areas. 

• Convey expectation that issues should be dealt with appropriately. Encourage Marine to talk to a chaplain or other trusted professional if appropriate. 

• Refer the Marine to Military OneSource for face-to-face support with a counselor and to obtain other resources.

• If you suspect abuse, refer the Marine to Family Advocacy and notify the proper authorities.  Ensure the victim, whether AD or civilian, is offered victim advocacy services through the Family Advocacy Program (FAP).

• Follow the guidelines in Report of Incident.

What to Avoid

• Waiting to report abuse to proper authorities even when only a reasonable suspicion exists

• Delaying action may mean more serious abuse may occur. 

• Launching an investigation without collaborating with law enforcement, legal, and FAP or activating the coordinated community response.

• Although exploring a suspicion of abuse by talking to the Marine and supervisors is appropriate, conducting an investigation without other agency involvement can put the victim at risk for escalating violence and may contaminate evidence.

• Ignoring observations, letting problems continue or to get worse.

• Not taking the problem seriously or minimizing concerns, joining with the alleged offender in blaming the victim for the abuse.

• Supporting perceptions that abusive behavior in an intimate relationship is justified or appropriate in some situations.

• Forming conclusions about a particular situation before having enough information or believing the alleged offender just because he/she is the active duty member.

• Not consulting with FAP, legal, or other authorities before deciding on a course of action.

• Holding the belief that domestic abuse is a private affair and failing to ask if abuse is occurring.

What to Expect after Taking Action

• If the suspicion is not supported, but concern still exists that the family is at risk, most Marines will follow-though with recommendations to seek assistance, participate in prevention programs and classes, , or see a chaplain if supported to do so.

• If the suspicion is supported and aFamily Advocacy Program (FAP) is made and authorities are notified, leaders can expect many of the same reactions noted in the section Report of Incident.

• Marines may minimize, deny, and blame their spouse/partner for suspicious injuries or behavior. It is important not to form a conclusion until information is obtained from other sources, in particular from the spouse if possible. Enlisting the assistance of Provost Marshall Office, Staff Judge Advocate, and the Victim Advocate at FAP might be useful in trying to determine if a more in-depth assessment or investigation is warranted.

• Even when abuse is not occurring, many people are reluctant to discuss their personal lives with supervisors and may not disclose the full story. Often commanders are only getting the tip of the iceberg.

Troubleshooting

• Some Marines may deny there is a problem, minimize issues, or refuse to participate in recommended services. This may be an indication that more serious problems are occurring and may require more active involvement from leaders.

• Marine may not be showing any signs of improvement or problems may escalate after intervention.  Leaders may want to consult with Legal, Family Advocacy staff, chaplain, or Clinical Counseling staff to determine if another course of action might be appropriate.

• In either circumstance noted above, leaders may want to consider disciplinary action.